Feels Like Home

Disclaimer: I don't own anything that has anything to do with THE WEST WING.
Aaron Sorkin, Warner Brothers, NBC, and who ever else, it all belongs to
them. I also don't own the lyrics to "Feels Like Home"

Archive: Sure just ask first

Feedback: Welcome

Authors Notes: This is my first WEST WING fan fic, so be kind I'm new at
this. The song "Feels Like Home" is written by Randy Newman, and performed
by many people including Newman, Bonnie Rait, and the version I was using to
write this story is by Chantel Kravenzic (that is spelled wrong by the way)
Chantel's version is on the DAWSON'S CREEK soundtrack.

Category: Josh/Donna. From Donna and Josh's POV. D&J's thoughts during a
dance. NOTE: I know that the song would have ended long before the story
does. But in this world the song lasts long enough.

Feels Like Home

Something in your eyes makes me want to lose myself
Makes me wanna lose myself
In your arms
There's something in your voice makes my heart beat fast
Hope this feeling lasts
The rest of my life

If you knew how lonely my life has been
And how long I've felt so low
If you knew how I wanted someone to come along
And change my life the way you've done

In any life, in any relationship there are moments. Moments that define us,
moments that make us who we are. Moments between two people when it seems as
if your heart is beating in time with his. Josh and I are having a moment.
Right now I can feel his heart beating, and it's racing as fast as my own.
We're dancing. We're at one of those events that requires the attendance of
the senior staff and of course Josh ordered me to come. Not that I didn't
want to. Time with Josh is time well spent. That's the thing. And believe
me we do have a thing. Lately it's becoming more obvious to me that I have
these feelings. Feelings that are not at all appropriate for an assistant
such as myself to have for her boss. I don't know how long I've known it
ran this deep, or if I'm just realizing it, dancing can do that. It can take
you to a place where it's just you and him. The music, the closeness,
there's just something about dancing. Maybe it's this song. I've heard it
before. I always thought it was pretty, but hearing it now, well it's almost
like it's speaking to my heart. And it's telling me Josh is the guy. Josh
is the one I dreamt about, Josh is the one I've waited for. Years of being
lonely, years of going out with, according to the object of my affection, an
endless line of gomers. And here I am. I'm in the arms of the man who
really did change my life. He gave me a chance. He found me valuable.
Moments I tell you, are happening more and more between us. The book he gave
me for Christmas, moment. He told me they should put me on a stamp, moment.
When he said I looked great in my red dress, moment. Yes, this is a moment
despite the fact that he was a total jerk before, telling me I had no vibe
and no self worth, but I prefer to look at that as being an idiot Josh
outburst of jealousy. Anyway I could go on and on with the moments. I could
tell you all the things he's said about me that he doesn't know I know he's
said. Like his comments to Matt Skinner or to Sam after my Joey Lucas
ranting. People talk in this workplace, things get back to you through the
grape vine known as Bonnie, Ginger, Carol, Cathy, and Margaret. But the most
powerful moment happened when he wasn't even awake. The moment I found out
he had been shot. That's when I knew. I've fallen head over heals before I
could help myself. And it just feels so right.

Feels like home to me
Feels like home to me
Feels like I'm all the way back where I come from
Feels like home to me
Feels like home to me
Feels like I'm all the way back where I belong

It really does feel like home. Like this is right where I'm meant to be. I
lied to him all those times I said I had the good vibe. But now I can
honestly say I got the good vibe. And I wonder if just maybe, there's a
chance he feels it too.

A window breaks down a long dark street
And a siren wails in the night
But I'm alright cause I have you here with me
And I can almost see through the dark there is light

If you knew how much this moment means to me
And how long I've waited for your touch
If you knew how happy you are making me
I never thought I'd love anyone so much

Donna and I are dancing. I'm dancing with Donna. And for some reason I can't
explain my heart is beating about a mile a minute. This song we're dancing
to isn't helping to diminish the fuzzy feelings I'm experiencing. Dancing
with Donna and listening to the words of this song, let's just say it's
hitting home. I mean were they thinking about me when they wrote this. Were
they thinking about me and Donna? I figure that this is entirely possible
considering the fact that I am Joshua Lyman and of course the world revolves
around me, so I'm pretty sure whoever wrote this saw into the future. They
saw what's been happening between me and my assistant these past few months
and wrote this song. And yes something has been happening. Something I have
been trying to deny for a long time. Joey Lucas had to go and make me
confront the issue with her dial up the numbers speech. Of course I blame
Donna. If she hadn't been pushing me to gather my rosebuds I could have went
on in complete and total denial of the entire situation. Donna. I'm holding
Donna and I feel like some high school kid on his first date. She went above
and beyond the call after the shooting. I'm very aware of the fact that I
would not have made it without her and her crazy rules. She's just so great.
And this feels so right. And at this moment, for the first time in a long
time, music sounds like music. I'm really all right and it's because of her.
I think this song is trying to tell me something that I already know in my
heart. She's my rosebud. She's the only rosebud I want to gather. But how
do I tell her. How do you tell someone who means the world to you, that you
woke up one day and realized that she's the one? That when you think about
forever, it's her face you see. I am not one to get emotional, that is
Donna's department. I try to keep it in check. But right now I'm finding
that very hard to do. I can't get over it, music is playing and it's
beautiful. Just like Donna. She's made all the difference. This is the
moment. I knew it was coming, it's been building from other moments for some
time now. This is one of the best moments of my life because it just feels
right.

Feels like home to me
Feels like home to me
Feels like I'm all the way back where I come from
Feels like home to me
Feels like home to me
Feels like I'm all the way back where I belong

It does feel that way. Feels like coming home. It's more than chemistry,
we've always had that. It's, dare I think it, love. And I wonder if she
feels this magic too. I can't wait around forever, we might not have
forever. If getting shot teaches you anything it teaches you that. I'm a man
of action, and now is the time to take action. I have to let her know how I
feel. I have to let her know that all of my remarks about gomers and self
worth are out of pure jealousy because I want to be the gomer. I pull away
from her so I can see her face. She looks beautiful.
"Donna"
"Yeah"
"It sounds like music"
She looks at me like I've just made her so incredibly happy.
"Really" she says with tears in her eyes. I know that there's a chance.
"It really does"

He said it sounded like music, not sirens, music. And he's looking at me
like I'm the reason why. I've got to take the chance. It seems like he's
opened the door. It's time to tell him how I feel. It's time to ask the
question and hear the answer. I take a deep breath and say
"It feels like....."
"Home" he finishes.
That does it. I'm even further gone, if that's at all possible.
"Home" I repeat
This is the moment. The moment I know he knows. I can see what I'm feeling
in my heart reflected in his eyes. And then it happens. The line is
crossed. Our lips meet. This kiss is, well there just aren't words. People
are all around us, but I don't care. It's finally happened and it is amazing
and undeniably right. We pull apart. And I'm waiting. Waiting for him to
say this is a mistake. But he just smiles, dimples at full voltage.
"Donnatella Moss" he says "I think there's a good chance I have feelings for
you"
'I'm pretty sure I might have feelings for you too"
"Feelings of the romantic capacity" he says
"Definitely feelings of romance" I confirm
"I would even go as far to say I might have feelings of love in a romantic
nature for you."
"It's hard to say, since I have no sense about these things, but I might have
feelings of love for you too.
"I was jealous" he says
"I know"
"It's gonna take some time to sort all of this out" I tell him
"Yeah it will, it won't be easy"
"No it won't"
"But I want to try, I want it to work"
"So do I"
He pulls me closer. And we keep on dancing. Moments, well as moments go I
have to say this has got to be one of the most precious moments of my life.

I think I'm grinning like an idiot. This is right. There is no doubt in my
mind. And I don't care what anyone else thinks or says. Years of banter, a
near death experience, a dance, a song and at last it's all out in the open.
I'm unbelievably happy. I'm home.
"I've gathered my rosebuds Donna"
She gives me the emotional that is the sweetest thing I've ever heard look of
hers
"Josh" she says
"I think this is gonna be our song"
She smiles
"I think your right"
"Of course I'm right, so in the face of me being right and in honor of our
new found relationship I really think you should bring me coffee from now on"
"As long as you have two legs that can travel the distance to the coffee pot,
I will never bring you coffee"
I smile at her
"Defiantly feelings of the love variety I have for you"
"Defiantly feelings of love"

Feels like home to me
Feels like home to me
Feels like I'm all the way back where I come from
Feels like home to me
Feels like home to me
Feels like I'm all the way back where I belong

The End

By CC

 

 

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