RATING: PG-13 (STRONG language)
ARCHIVE: Yeah, go ahead.
SUMMARY: The past comes back to haunt several key staff members when an
unexpected visitor comes along.
SERIES: The KD Brody Universe
DISCLAIMER: I do not own "The West Wing" or its characters, but I do own KD
Brody and David Beckwith, and a few other characters who are emerging in this
story, namely Carolyn Kent. Sammy belongs to Dallas. All hail Aaron Sorkin
for inventing these characters.
NOTES: Uh... . When it comes time ~~~~ denotes a flashback ~~~~ and
*denotes italics* for emphasis. "3 a.m." is by Matchbox 20, it is their song
and not mine.

"CJ?" Danny asked as he leaned in the door. CJ looked up and smiled.
"Hey." She exclaimed with a grin. He smiled back and moved completely
into the room, closing the door behind him.
"You called, my lady?" He asked as he moved around her desk. She stood up
and pulled him into a long kiss. He kissed her back, his arms moving up to
wrap around her. After a moment she pulled away and gazed into his eyes.
"Okay, I admit I wouldn't mind if you did that more often." He whispered. She
laughed softly.
"I think it's someone's birthday on Saturday." She whispered back. He
turned a little red and nodded. "Would that someone mind if I asked him to
let me take him to dinner?" She continued. He smiled and shook his head. She
smiled back and kissed him again, this time much more mildly.
"I don't remember telling you this." He exclaimed softly.
"I have sources of my own, you know?" She replied with a sly smirk. "New
watch?" She asked as she fingered the silver watch she knew had come from KD.
He nodded.
"Yeah, KD got it for me." He answered.
"I know. I was there when she ordered it. Why'd she give it to you so
early?" She asked. Danny shrugged.
"She said the next few days are gonna be hell for her, and that she
wanted it to be a special moment when she gave it to me. She said that after
ten years, a birthday present means a lot to her." He replied. CJ nodded.
"Makes sense. I admit, I had trouble thinking of something to get you,
but then I always have trouble thinking of presents for people. Anyway, I
went to talk to her, and she gave me a few ideas, but in the end, I'd say she
inspired me. In the long run, I hope you'll be happy with what you get." She
admitted. He smiled and clutched her closer, kissing her gently.
"I'm sure that I will." He whispered.

"*She says it's cold outside, hands me my raincoat. She's always worried
about things like that.*" The voice declared, slowly crooning from the radio.
KD stared at the headboard of her car as the words seemed to hit home. "*She
says it's all gonna end, might as well be my fault. She only sleeps when it's
raining. And she screams, and her voice is straining. Yeah, well she's says
'baby, well, it's 3 am, I must be lonely'. When she says 'baby, I can't help
but be scared of it all sometimes. Said the rain's gonna wash away, I believe
it.*" KD sighed and put the key into the ignition. The engine roared to life
as she turned the key and then backed out of her space, number 47, and drove
for the garage doors. The song continued.
"*She's got a little bit of something. God, it's better than nothing.*"
KD blinked back tears as she remembered. The times she had gotten sick
and there was no mother there for her. The times when she'd get home from
school and find her mom on the couch, passed out with an empty bottle of
whiskey. KD always used to pick up that bottle and throw it away before
covering her mother with a blanket and then going over to the Bartlet's or
the McGarry's.
""And in her color portrait world, she believes she's got it all.""
She began to wonder if they ever had anything. There was the color
portrait world, all right. But in it, there was nothing.
""She swears the moon don't hang quite as high as it used to.""
Mom never wanted to look at the stars with KD. Dad always did. What was
pessimism versus optimism? It was Mom versus Dad.
""And she only sleeps when it's raining. And she screams, and her voice
is straining.""
Mom screamed too often.
""She says, baby, it's 3 am, I must be lonely. When she says baby, well I
can't help but be scared of it all sometimes. Said the rain's gonna wash
away, I believe it.*" Rob Thomas's smooth voice declared. KD nodded in
agreement as she turned on to K street and drove for home. KD loved the rain,
the feeling of it washing over her. Maybe it was the feeling that the rain
was washing everything away, like Thomas said.
""She believes that life is made of all that you're used to. The clock on
the wall's been stuck at three for days and days. She thinks that happiness
is a mat that sits on her doorway. But outside, it's stopped raining.*"
Thomas began to croon again but KD switched the engine off. She didn't want
to hear the chorus again, nor did she want the song to end. She had never
pretended to understand her mother, but part of her felt so different now.
She didn't know what she wanted anymore. With a sigh, she pulled the key out
of the ignition, stepped out of the car, grabbed her stuff, locked the doors
and moved up the stairs to her apartment.

"What do you want?" The voice that asked was sharp and bitter. Carolyn
winced and sighed, glancing at her feet then up again at the young woman who
was leaning against the doorframe.
"I would like to talk to my daughter." She announced weakly.
"You gave up whatever rights you had as a mother years ago when you
walked away. Didn't you get a clear enough message earlier today?" KD
retorted sharply. She didn't want this.
"I made a mistake." Carolyn admitted.
"No, really." KD retorted dryly.
"I'd like to fix it." The mother exclaimed.
"What makes you think you can?" The daughter returned angrily.
"Just talk to me? For a little while?" Carolyn pleaded. KD sighed and
shut the door with a soft slam. Carolyn winced again and sighed, turning
away. She'd tried and she'd failed again. She took a step down and then heard
the sound of a door opening. She turned to see KD stepping out of the door,
pulling her jacket on and fumbling with the keys. Carolyn watched as KD
finally got the jacket on and locked her door. Then she stuffed the keys into
her pocket and walked down to the street. The younger woman stopped and
turned.
"You coming or not?" She asked darkly. Carolyn took a deep breath and
moved to walk alongside her daughter. They walked for awhile, neither one
saying anything. KD sighed. "Talk." She insisted bitterly after the silence.
"Katy, I know you're mad at me, and you have every right-" Carolyn
started hesitantly.
"What do you want?" KD interrupted impatiently.
"What do you mean, sweetie?" Carolyn asked softly.
"Don't call me that. If you want to call me something, call me KD. You
lost any other nicknames a long time ago. And I meant, what do you want from
me? You disappear for twenty years and then you're back. Why?" KD clarified
sharply. Carolyn sighed and looked elsewhere.
"I came back to fix my mistakes." She replied.
"Bullshit. Besides, what makes you think they're fixable? What do you
really want? Money? Politics? Shelter? What? Love and forgiveness? I'm afraid
you're out of luck on those last two." KD added with a taste of irony.
"I don't want any of those things." Carolyn insisted. "I just want to
talk to you, try to fix a mistake that I made so long ago. A bad mistake. I
want to make sure that you know that when I left, I wasn't really thinking. I
just -"
"*'Dear Kathryn, I think you know what I have to say. You know me well
enough. I just want you to know that this is not about you. You are a
beautiful, intelligent child. I simply do not deserve this life that I have.
I simply must do what my heart tells me to. Farewell, dear heart. Signed
Carolyn Kent, your mother departed.*" KD recited passively, evenly as if she
were reading the latest polling statistics. They walked another block,
sharing a mournful pause as Carolyn processed the speech.
"I was wrong." She said finally.
"Damn straight." KD retorted with a bitter chuckle.
"What can I say?" Carolyn asked.
"Nothing. There's nothing you can say." KD replied honestly.
"Kathryn-" Carolyn started to plead.
"Nothing!" KD snapped as she stopped in her tracks. She stood there for a
moment while Carolyn stared at her with a broken hearted gaze. Then KD turned
and faced her mother for the first time. "I lost you long before you left. I
lost you long before Dad left. Sometimes I wonder if I ever had you. My
parents were the Bartlets and the McGarrys, long before you left." She said
softly but sharply.
"That's not fair. I did the best I could. I did what I thought was
right." Carolyn interjected. KD scoffed.
"Oh, please. 'this is not about you'? Nothing was ever about me. You
didn't even think about me when you wrote that damn note. What your heart
told you to? For God's sake, you expect to tell me that your heart told you
to leave a fifteen year old daughter alone in the world and then have me hug
you and welcome you home? You know, people at my school were taking bets that
you'd committed suicide!" KD exclaimed angrily. Carolyn sighed.
"I didn't. I'm here now, trying to be there for you, trying to make up
for the wrongs I did to you." She whispered.
"Some mistakes aren't fixable!" KD snapped.
"Maybe you should give me a chance!" Carolyn retorted sharply, her
patience being tried. "You're not being fair, Katy."
"Jed helped me with my homework. Leo taught me how to drive. Abbey and
Jenny helped me understand puberty and what was happening to my body. Jed
told me what to be wary about with boys. The McGarrys helped me fill out
college applications when I was seventeen. Jed drove me to the fucking morgue
so that I could see my father's dead fucking body!!! Don't you fucking tell
me what is or isn't fair!!!" KD exploded and then stormed away. Carolyn
didn't follow. She knew it wouldn't do any good, no matter how much pleading
she did. She'd made a mistake.
"What was I thinking?" She whispered to herself as a tear rolled down her
cheek. She glanced after her daughter and then turned towards the sunset.
With a sigh, she walked away again. Down the block, KD hailed a cab and took
it across town to her boyfriend's apartment.

"Hello." Leo said softly. Jenny looked up from the report she was reading
and smiled. He moved across the room and sat down on the arm of the chair she
was sitting in. She smiled, bookmarked the report and looked up into his
eyes.
"Hi there." She replied. He smiled and kissed her gently.
"How was your day?" He asked softly. She shrugged and kissed him back.
"Slow, as usual." She exclaimed. "I'm glad you're home." She added
suddenly. Leo smiled a little wider.
"It's good to see you too." He replied.
"No, I mean I'm glad you're home." She whispered. He smiled still wider
and nodded.
"I'm glad too." He assured her before kissing her again. After another
moment past, Leo pulled away from her to catch a breath of air. He smiled at
her and kissed her forehead. Then he stood up and offered his hand to her.
"Come on." He whispered. She smiled, took his hand and enjoyed the warm
embrace that he pulled her into. It felt good to be in his arms again.
"I missed you, Leo." She whispered as they slowly rocked together across
the floor, as if dancing to some unheard music. He held her tighter and
sighed, overjoyed to hear her say such words.
"I missed you too, Jenny. Very much." He replied. Then she looked up at
him and they kissed once again.

Sam closed the report and looked around, trying to remember what it was
he was supposed to do. He pointed to the agenda, the computer, the report,
his phone and then stopped to think about it. Then he remembered. He smiled
inwardly and moved to grab his jacket.
"Kathy, I'm done for today." He exclaimed as he stepped out of his office
with his briefcase and tried to lock the door. Kathy nodded and finished
packing up her own stuff. Sam smiled at her and disappeared down the hallway,
humming a tune he'd heard on the radio early that morning.
"Don't go breaking my heart." He murmured as he slapped the elevator key.
"I couldn't if I tried." Mallory joined in as she came up behind him. Sam
turned, grinning and walked up to her.
"Hey. I was just going to meet you." He exclaimed softly. She smiled and
wrapped his arms around her.
"And I was just coming to get you. What a coincidence." She replied and
kissed him gently. He smiled and kissed her back.
"That feels good." He whispered to her. "I could get used to that."
"Maybe I could too." She replied as she led him into the elevator car.

"Hey, you." Zoey exclaimed as she walked up to Charlie. He smiled and
took her into his arms as she reached him. He kissed her as he felt her arms
wrap around him. "You ready to get off work yet?" She asked after they broke
apart, neither one going very far. He smiled a little wider and nodded.
"Yes. Are you ready for me to get off work yet?" He asked softly. She
laughed and tickled him gently. He laughed and took a hold of her hands. "You
like doing that, don't you?" He teased. She nodded and wrapped her arms
around his neck again.
"I like doing a great many things, but right now I'm hungry, and I can
hear your tummy from right here, so let's go eat, okay?" She asked softly.
Charlie nodded, kissed her gently and then grabbed his jacket.
"Good night, Mrs. Landingham." Charlie exclaimed as he slipped his jacket
on.
"Good night, Charlie. Good night, Zoey." Mrs. Landingham replied with a
warm smile. The two young lovers smiled back.
"Good night, Mrs. Landingham." Zoey said.
"What happens after we eat?" Charlie asked as they stepped out into the
hallway.
"Want to watch some movies in my dorm again?" She asked as they walked.
He nodded and slipped an arm around her waist as they walked.
"Sounds good to me." He whispered before kissing her below the ear. She
giggled as he opened the door for her and they stepped out into the cold
night air, Gina right behind them with a smile on her face.

"David! Where are you?" Ginger called as she looked around the bullpen.
David raised a hand and quickly followed it, rising to his feet with a pen in
his mouth as he continued to study the report KD had given him. Ginger smiled
and shook her head as she walked over to the young man. "It's nearly
six-thirty. Stop working already." She exclaimed as she took the report out
of his sight and stuffed it into a drawer. He looked at her about to say
something when the pen fell out of his mouth. He looked down at it and then
up at her again.
"I'm just trying to do this right." He replied. She smirked and rested a
hand against his cheek.
"You're doing fine, so come with me and do something else right." She
insisted. He smiled and nodded. He turned, grabbed his jacket and pulled it
on. Then he turned back, pushed his chair in and moved with Ginger towards
door. Then he stopped suddenly and looked at her. She stopped and looked back
at him, confused. "David?" She asked, somewhat worried. David smiled at her,
a smile that she'd seen very rarely, and very admittedly made her wilt
slightly. He moved forward, took her into his arms and kissed her very
tenderly.
"I'll endeavor not to disappoint you." He whispered softly. Ginger
blushed a little, surprised to be so happy in his arms.
"I'll hold you to that." She whispered back and then moved out of his
arms into the hallway. David grinned, quite pleased with himself, which was a
rare event, and followed her as they went to dinner as planned.

"Danny?" CJ asked as she leaned into the reporter's office. Danny looked
up from the article he was trying to type and smiled.
"Hey. I thought we were going out tomorrow." He exclaimed. She shrugged
and came to sit on his desk.
"I couldn't wait." She admitted playfully. He grinned and stood, placing
his hands on her waist.
"That feels good to hear." He whispered. She smiled and pulled him into a
kiss. His hands slipped up around her waist and held her closer.
"You feeling like getting some dinner?" She asked softly when they
finally parted again, leaning their foreheads together. He shrugged before
kissing her again lightly. She smiled and kept her hands on his chest.
"Sounds good to me. I'm done here." He replied just as softly.
"Oh, but you're just beginning." She teased before he kissed her again.

"Josh, stop that." Donna said with a grin.
"What?" Josh asked innocently as he continued to stroke her leg under the
table with his foot. She kicked him and laughed as he pretended to be in the
worst of pain. "Hey, I was just being affectionate." He whimpered. She
smiled and leaned forward across the table, taking his face in her hands.
"Save it for later." She whispered. He grinned like an idiot and nodded.
"I'll do my best." He replied.
"For now, concentrate on your food. You're paying a lot of money for it,
so you might want to enjoy it." Donna advised. Josh nodded and took another
bite of his fancy chicken dish. Then he looked up at her again and watched
her chew. She seemed so graceful, so beautiful there across from him in the
dim light of the restaurant. She smiled when she caught him staring.
"What took us so long?" He asked softly. She smiled a little and shrugged.
"I was just waiting on you." She teased.
"Then what took me so long?" He retorted.
"I don't know. I often wonder the same thing." She replied softly. He
smiled and began stroking her leg again with his foot. She smiled a little
wider and reciprocated the gesture.

"I hate long days." Jed murmured as he collapsed against the couch next
to his wife. She chuckled, not looking up from her book and nodded. He
smirked and put an arm around her shoulder. "Sometimes I think you like those
damn books more than me." He whispered. She looked at him and nodded.
"But of course." She whispered. He grinned and kissed her gently. She
reached up to take his face in her hands while she kissed him back. He tossed
her book aside and took her into his arms. She laughed as he began to kiss
her neck. "You never quit, do you, Jed?" She asked playfully. He grinned and
shook his head.
"Never." He whispered back before he kissed her again. She kissed him
back very passionately as her hands moved to the buttons of his shirt. He
smiled through the kiss and glanced at her hands. "Thank God, you never do
either." He added before kissing her again and pressing her back against the
couch.

"It's been a long day. Are you okay?" Toby asked as he walked into the
kitchen where KD had just moved off to. She sighed and moved to the
refridgerator to look for something for dinner.
"I'm fine. I really am. I just... What do you want for dinner? Fish?"
She asked softly, changing the subject. Toby sighed and walked up behind her,
slipping his arms around her waist and closing the fridge door. She smiled
weakly as he spun her in his arms so that she faced him and then pressed her
against the fridge.
"Tell me the truth, cause you know you can't lie to me." He whispered as
he clutched her close. She smiled a little wider and wrapped her arms around
his neck.
"I love you. I love that you want to take care of me." She replied softly
before kissing him gently. He kissed back then pulled away, still clasping
her in his arms. He stared her in the eye, a wry smile on his lips.
"Dirty trick. Stop avoiding the question." He insisted softly. She smiled
and nodded, holding him close.
"The truth is that today upset me a great deal, but I'm proud of the way
that I handled myself and I just want to spend my evening with you, not
thinking about what happened today. Sound good?" She replied gently. Toby
smiled and nodded, kissing her and holding her close. Suddenly he felt her
pulling him closer as their kiss intensified. He readjusted his grip and
pressed her against his body. She made a soft noise and slipped her hands
under his jacket, over his shoulders, holding him as if she could never let
go. She kissed his neck and then whispered in his ear.
"I'm happy here, Toby."
"So am I, Katy."

The End... .

 

 

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