Comfort through Trials - Between the Lines
Archive: If you want it, take it. Just let me know where it's going.
Rating: R (language)
Spoilers: None that I know of.
Author's Notes: Sequel to "Comfort through Trials - Fractured Fairy
Disclaimer: They're not mine, I just borrow them to play with.
Lisa is still curled up on my bed, but I think she finally stopped crying. Sarah called and said she followed Sam to the..... She followed him, and wanted to take him to see Stanley. I gave her his number, and I hope Sam's alright. I want to run across town and sit on the steps of Stanley's office, but I don't think Lisa should be alone right now.
How could Sam even think I would fuck his girlfriend behind his back? Does he really think that little of me? And even if he did think so little of me, he certainly shouldn't think that little of Lisa. She adores him, and I think he just broke her heart. By that one look, that one look where Sam basically told her he thought she was cheating, he broke her heart. Then, as if that wasn't bad enough, he had to move beyond that look and call her.... Call her a whore. Just for that, I ought to break his legs. If I didn't know better, I'd think he wanted me to go beat him up. You just don't treat someone like Lisa, like..... Okay, time to stop and breathe.
"Joshua." She's up. Up is good. It means she not still crying into my pillow, which is definitely better. I tell her Sarah has him, and that she's taking him to see Stanley. Lisa just stares at me a bit, and I extend my arms toward her. The next thing I know, she's buried her cheek against my shoulder and she's crying again. I don't do well with crying, and I don't do well with crying, particularly not with women, by those who could seriously hurt me. Of course, the only two women I would put in that category are CJ and Lisa, but that's beside the point.
The point? Right, the point. The point is Sam should not be allowed to walk all over her like this. She certainly adores him, and he doesn't realize how lucky he is, not when he storms out of here yelling about how he can't trust her. If he weren't Sam, I would have broken his nose, his nose and both his legs. Actually, if he doesn't apologize for being a jerk to her, I might break something anyway.
She sniffles a bit, and I lead her over to the couch. Coffee. Coffee would be good right now. I need caffeine and I think she could use something in her stomach and coffee's the only thing I know how to make with any degree of skill. I'm not about to make her suffer through my bad cooking, at least, not today.
By the time I come back to the living room with two cups of coffee, Lisa has fallen asleep on the couch. She looks so uncomfortable, that I set down the coffee and pick her up, taking her back to my bed and setting her on top of the covers.
I can't really decide what to do next, because Sam's being taken care of and Lisa's asleep, so I think about calling Donna or CJ to talk. I throw that idea out though. I don't think either Sam or Lisa would appreciate me spreading their business through the White House.
Just to have something to do, I decide to finish putting Lisa's things away. Her room's just how we left it last night, and I can't help but notice the gun sitting on the bed. I still can't believe she has a gun. It's not one of those little guns that they show on TV inside the heroine's nightstand either. This is a pretty big handgun, and I can't quite decide what it reminds me of, but it's definitely a big gun.
Starting with where she left off, I start sorting and shelving her books. Between the two of us, we could furnish a library. We don't read the same things though, and I haven't ever looked through her books before. Most of them are legal texts, compilations of court decisions, brief books, and a few research texts. Maybe that's why I don't look through her books. I haven't touched a law book since, well, since law school. There's also a wide selection of dictionaries, style manuals, thesauruses, quote books, and a set of encyclopedia. I'd almost forgotten how seriously Lisa takes her writing. With Sam and Toby, writing is more work, but Lisa always write's like someone's driving her to uncover the words, to create the ideas. Opening the next box, I can't help but laugh. Three more dictionaries, and three more quote books. Lisa, I think you're obsessed with words.
The ringing of the phone drags me back into the living room, and I'm shocked to hear Sam's voice. Not only am I shocked because I would have thought I was the last person Sam would be talking to, but also because he sounds like hell. I get over being mad right away, because Sarah takes the phone away from him, and asks if I can talk for a second. Of course I can talk for a second. Does she think I'm just going to hang up?
"Stanley was worried about him, Josh. He wants him to go back on his drugs." See, now I'm confused. If the drugs were making him sick and causing problems with his heart and his th... th... something else important, then why would Stanley want him back on.... "It's bad, isn't it." Sarah doesn't answer me right away, but when she does, it's with enough force that I forget why I ever called her a helpless housewife. Actually, I didn't call her a helpless housewife, I said she reminded me of a helpless housewife. Big difference there, but I still don't think she's forgiven me.
"He doesn't want to start him on lithium. There are some other drugs.... After he went off the lithium, Stanley doesn't think he'll respond to it as well now." I have to ask how bad it can possibly be. I mean, he only stopped taking the lithium a week ago. He can't be doing that badly. Wouldn't I have noticed if he was? I mean, I see him every day. I work with him every day. Surely I would have noticed, and even if I hadn't, CJ would have noticed, or Lisa..... Anyway, someone would have noticed.
Sarah orders me to get a pencil and paper, and I comply, mainly because I know nothing about drugs, and I can't look them up if I don't know what they are. Valproate. Carbamazepine. Lamotrigine. Nimodipine. Let me get this straight. Sam has severe side effects with one drug, because he's too stubborn to get blood tests, so they want to put him on four drugs, because now that he's gone off of it, the first one might now work. Sam, you are so dead when I get ahold of you. That's just stupid. Why couldn't you just trust us to deal with the press, so that you could keep taking just the lithium?
Sarah must want to give me a heart attack, which might not be very hard to do, because she keeps talking. Sam doesn't want to go on the drugs, but since right now, he's giving an oration to her 6 month old daughter about his encounter with Justice Mendoza, and Hitler, she's thinking he's in some sort of manic phase. Suddenly, I'm sort of glad Lisa still asleep. I'm not ready to worry her more than she is already. Of course, if Sam's not with it, I'm his emergency contact, and I'm supposed to tell Stanley if he can start the new drugs. Sarah wants me to call Stanley. You know, I don't think Sam can be that bad. After all, he did just think Lisa was cheating on him, and I know if I was in his position, I wouldn't be all that balanced. It's normal, right? Besides, he was fine yesterday, so I don't think he can be that bad.
Apparently there's a flaw in my logic, because Sarah's yelling at me. Did I really call her a mommy machine? I don't remember that, but as CJ always tells me, I seldom remember those moments when I'm sticking my foot in my mouth. Selective recall I suppose. Fine, just let me think about this, talk to Lisa, and I'll call Stanley this afternoon.
I have to sit down. Sam is sick. He's sick, and I've been trying to ignore it. I don't think I've been all the successful at it, but still.... I should wake up Lisa. She'll know where to find information about the drugs, and short of calling Donna, I don't think I'll be able to find out a thing. Plus, I think I ought to ask her what she thinks. I can't..... She needs to sleep, and I don't want to talk about Sam anymore right now. I think I'll finish unpacking her books first.
The dictionaries, and writing books fill up the rest of the bookshelf, and I start in on the shelves filling the wall near the window. There's an assortment of journals, and bodice rippers, and I have to roll my eyes at some of the titles. I decide that the amount of shelf space is going to be packed once the last box in opened. I shelve a few of them before realizing what they are. Psychology books. Piles and piles of psychology books, and a book about forensics, and another about criminal law, but mostly psychology books. They look a little dusty, and I'm pretty sure none of them are newer than the eighties, but I can't figure out why Lisa'd have them. With Sam, I can understand a couple of them, but it doesn't look like they've been read in years, and none of them seem to have anything to do with Sam's condition. So what's the catch?
"Josh?" Lisa's awake now. Time to forget about her library and talk about what they want us to do. I mean, I suppose if Sam needs drugs, I should tell Stanley to give him drugs, but I.... I guess I think Lisa should make the decision. Why am I Sam's emergency contact anyway?