TITLE: Donna Moss Talks About Sex and Joey Lucas
(1/1)
AUTHOR: Laurel A.
SPOILERS: In The Shadow of Two Gunmen, Noel,
Bartlet's Third State
of the Union, and all the "Joey Lucas" episodes.
RATING: PG
DISCLAIMER: I don't own or have any rights to any of
these
characters. They belong to Aaron Sorkin, Warner
Brothers, NBC, and
probably some other folks as well, just not me.
ARCHIVE: Archive anyplace, just let me know (and you
have no idea
how happy that would make me).
SUMMARY: Donna thinks about Josh and Joey Lucas.
Takes place where
we left off after Bartlet's Third State of the Union.
AUTHORS NOTE: Follows my last piece, Roles (1/1) and
with Masks
(1/1) by Michelle Hoffmann. I also want to thank
Michelle for her
support, humor and feedback, and for liking
semi-colons, maps, and
trains!
****************************************
The idea was for me to be totally okay with Joey Lucas
coming out to
run the polling for Bartlet's third State of the Union
address.
Simple idea really. But, given the fact that my
Always-There-When-
You-Need-Me role isn't quite so needed when Joey is in
town, this
wasn't the easiest plan to put into place.
Josh and Joey have this great chemistry, you can feel
it all through
the bullpen when they are doing their banter thing
(hence me not
being quite so needed). And, as much as I feel left
out, it really
is endearing to see Josh get so excited about someone,
to see him
energized and, well, sexually charged. And I like
Joey, I really
do. Unlike the way I felt about Mandy, Joey feels
_real_ to me. She
is a real woman, she is
Powerful-Confident-Smart-Loyal-Woman-and-You-
All-Know-It; and Josh definitely knows it. I admire
that; I am also
jealous of that. I admire the fact that she's got
enough sense of
herself as a woman to be
Powerful-Confident-Smart-Loyal-Woman-and-You-
All-Know-It; and I am jealous that Josh sees her that
way.
My point in telling Josh that he should ask Joey out
was two-fold:
one -- to prove to myself (and to him a bit) that I
didn't mind that
Joey was around; and two -- to get Josh to move on
with the whole
Joey Lucas thing and just, well, get on with things.
Part two is twofold in itself: one – Joey is one of
the things I
believe to be an emotional loose end for
Post-Shooting-Josh; and two -
- with re-election around the corner, we will likely
be working
closely with Joey quite a bit, and Josh needs (and
maybe I want him
to) to get into or past whatever he is going to get
into or get past
with Joey.
Plus I do really like Joey Lucas. I just like Josh
more, and since
my "take stock of life" Christmas epiphany, if you
will, I have been
feeling protective of him, grateful for him, and
rather used to
having him to myself. So, when I think of the
Always-There-When-You-
Need-Me part not being so needed, it is a really empty
feeling.
Josh and I have become a team, we have a rhythm, we
have a (and I
hate to use the word, but it feels like the best way
to describe it)
_vibe_. But, I am always wary of Ego-Maniac-Josh
thinking that I
think too much of him. And I am scared of Real-Josh
finding out that
I really do think so much of him.
So, in light of Joey Lucas being in town, I used
Quirky-Assistant to
hide behind, but I think I let it just a tad too far
out of the
bottle, blathering on to Josh about how he should ask
Joey out.
Sometimes I let my mouth get ahead of me. I turn into
Annoying-
Little-Sister, which is definitely not what I want
Josh to think of
me as. Remember
Powerful-Confident-Smart-Loyal-Woman-and-You-All-
Know-It? That is how I want him to think of me, and I
think I am
ready for that.
I think that since the shooting, Josh has been feeling
disconnected.
I think he is looking for some human contact, some
intimacy. If this
is indeed what he needs (or thinks he needs), I'd
rather he find that
intimacy with Joey than some random woman. He has
this way of just
stumbling across someone to satisfy (at least for the
moment) his
needs, then he deals with the fact that he doesn't
really like them
by acting like a self absorbed workaholic jerk until
they break up
with him. I know that Real-Josh wants more than that;
he wants
something real. I am just not sure if
Post-Shooting-Josh is ready
for more, or for real. So for now, Joey Lucas can be
more and real.
I think I am in the minority among the White House
staff who didn't
blame Joey for Josh getting really hurt when he found
Al Keiffer
stepping out of her shower at the hotel in Los
Angeles. Josh didn't
hold it against her – he told me himself that she had
let him know
while they were at the fundraiser that she was there
_with_ someone,
and I think he felt more the fool for going to her
room knowing
that. Actually, I think for a while he blamed me for
having to see
Joey with Al – with all my "gather his rosebuds"
goading.
But, because she was up front with him, I consider
Joey to be safe.
She is an honest person; I trust her with Josh. And
Post-Shooting-
Josh needs to be with someone trustworthy.
So, while the emotions that well up in me at the
thought of Josh
being intimate with someone make me jumpy and remind
me of being in
the 7th grade and seeing the boy who told you he liked
you last week
holding hands with the most popular girl in school, I
don't think
that Real-Josh is ready to trust his heart to anyone,
and that makes
me feel better. Post-Shooting-Josh's heart can be
safe with Joey
until Real-Josh's heart is ready.
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